I am very excited to welcome guest blogger Sharon Howard of Day in the Life of a Busy Gal to my blog today to do a little bit of question and answer regarding her diagnosis of Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD). As most of you know, I am diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder and have always been curious about how others with a diagnosis of a mental disorder cope and go on in their lives. Sharon was kind enough to answer my questions and share a bit of her story with us here.
Please tell us about yourself and your blog.
Hi, I’m Sharon, 34 from Birmingham in the UK, currently living in Redditch (just outside Birmingham). I have two children aged 17 & 18 ho both have medical problems. My daughter (17) was born with a heart condition and has had major surgery to correct this; my son (18) was born 13 weeks early and has autism and dyspraxia, he also had epilepsy which has (hopefully) now outgrown. I spent most of the last 18 years as a full-time career for my children and my husband (who died of his Brain Tumor in 2009).
I started writing my blog in 2010 but didn’t really get into it properly till April 2011, it is mainly a personal blog where I share my experiences, thoughts and opinions but I also include a variety of other subjects – there’s something for everyone really.
I understand that you are affected by Borderline Personality Disorder. How and when were you diagnosed?
I had been suffering with ‘depression’ on and off since I was a teenager, but it wasn’t until 2009 when things got really bad, before my husband died. We split up in May that year and he died in September, but even before and after that my mental health was deteriorating rapidly. It took a prolonged assessment in 2010 for a diagnosis of BPD to finally be reached – but I only found out by receiving a copy of the report sent to my GP in the post, otherwise I would still be none the wiser. I had no support for the diagnosis and have not really had any since, I have had to search out a private therapist as the NHS have me on a waiting list that I have heard nothing from…
Is there anything beneficial or good about having BPD?
I’m not sure really, I guess it makes me a very interesting person as I find that people are fascinated by the range of things I can do and it gives me very interesting things to write about.
What has been your worst BPD moment?
That would have to be my crisis in April this year, which led to me being made homeless when my partner threw me out as a result of the things I did because of my crisis.
What has been your best BPD moment?
I guess it would be the recognition I am gaining online for my writing. Writing about BPD has been a main contributor to the increase in visits to my blog and as a result I have been asked to write guest posts for other blogs and the UK National Mental Health Charity MIND.
What would you say to someone newly diagnosed with BPD?
Don’t Google it! I was freaked out when I read the letter about my diagnosis and the first thing I did was Google it! The first things that come up in a Google search are not the most helpful things. Instead go straight to a mental health charity website or BPD website and read about it there if you must. I’m not sure how much use talking to your GP would be as mine hadn’t got a clue about it (and nor have any I’ve spoken to since – you have to inform them, which is not a very good situation to be in if you have no mental health support yourself, for a condition you currently know nothing about!). Even once you have gathered some more helpful supportive information join some forums online, Facebook has some great user-led support groups, but also be careful here too as there are some where people get nasty with each other too! Follow me on twitter, if you are newly diagnosed, and send me a tweet asking for links to some of the better resources – or even check out my blog! As a result of writing this I have realized I need to write a post containing links to some useful BPD resources for helping those who are newly diagnosed (and their loved ones) find some good rather than scary information!
Music has been an important part of my treatment and recovery of bipolar disorder. Have you been affected by music or other arts in your illness?
I’ve always loved music, but don’t think it has really been much help with my ‘treatment/recovery’ I wouldn’t really say I have found much that helps yet. The only ‘treatment’ I am having is my private therapy sessions and I am definitely not in recovery. While I believe this ‘may’ be possible for some BPD sufferers I think the most the majority of us can hope for is phases of remission (much like cancer). I think BPD is a life sentence – this may seem a negative opinion, but as the help and support needed to enable recovery is very limited we only really have each other to help us ‘manage’ our condition I can only ‘hope’ for more… For me though he bet form of ‘therapy’ I am finding at the moment (in the arts) is writing, I am developing my craft and in researching to write about BPD I am learning a lot to help myself as well as others.
Since we both know that our diagnosis does not define us, what makes you special or unique?
LOL, everything about me!? I am very unusual in every sense of the word. People say I am ‘crazy, clever, funny, beautiful…’ a freak, geek, nerd, party animal, friendly, hard-working, pretty, devoted, loyal, helpful – the list goes on. People tend to love me or hate me – they love my uniqueness and individuality, they hate me due to jealousy because I am everything they wish they had the guts or confidence to be/do. They just don’t see that I am actually not as confident as I might appear; I’m shy, nervous and hide away like a recluse most of the time!
What are your other hobbies/interests?
In addition to writing I love reading, mainly sci-fi, fantasy, horror fiction but pretty much anything goes really and I even read reference materials for fun! LOL- I like to study, I have completed an Honors degree with the Open University and I’m now working towards the last few modules for a second Honors degree – I actually chose my latest module (Sociology) after writing a few blog posts on sociological topics and reading a sociology book for fun! LOL- I like to sing (even applied to go on x-factor!) dance (but my joints don’t like me doing that!)I love movies and go to see new releases often (again sci-fi, horror, action are the preference but most things except cheesy girly chick flicks will do). Arts, crafts – I’m currently learning photography for fun. I also like to explore new places and try new things. Again the list goes on and on as I’m always trying something new!
Thank you again to Sharon for her generous willingness to open up to me regarding her experiences with Borderline Personality Disorder. She has a wonderful way with words and is so very kind and approachable. Please also visit and explore her wonderful blog http://showard76.wordpress.com/ as well! There is much to read and enjoy there!
Thank you, Sharon!
missriki 